As I write this, I’m getting organized to head to Chicago. With my parents. To visit my brother and his family. Oh, and to run the 40th Chicago Marathon. That’s happening too.

It’s crazy, I haven’t wrapped my mind around the fact I’m going to run a marathon Sunday. For the first time in my marathon running life, it hasn’t received the bulk of my focus and attention these past few weeks. It’s not at center stage.

Me, dorking out at the Grandma’s finish line in Duluth – and I wasn’t even running.

This isn’t totally shocking, even for me, as this marathon has also been the strangest training period for me. In addition to my mental state being off, I’ve admittedly focused less on my actual training than previous marathons. Mileage has been lower, nutrition not strict and tracked, and cross-training and other details that are usually crucial to me during marathon prep haven’t been.

What gives? You’d think I wasn’t excited to run Chicago Marathon for the first time. A race I’ve wanted to run for a few years now. A race I’ve heard nothing but wonderful things about. A race several of my family members are attending to watch and cheer.

Aside from some significant life changes that have come the past several weeks (which have been good, no worries there), I can’t put my finger on this one.

I know this training season has been one of the hardest I can remember, primarily due to the fact most of it occurred during the summer (a first for me). I wonder if the fall race timing is throwing me off a bit too, as I’ve never run a marathon this time of year? A big part of why I think this hasn’t sunk in yet is I’m still in denial about my brother not being able to run with me.

After training hard and jumping through a few hoops to get into the race, which would have been his first marathon, he found out last week a stress fracture is going to prevent him from running. I’m selfishly bummed to not have him by my side, taking a 26.2-mile stroll through the city he calls home, but I’m especially bummed for him having to miss out. While he probably has major FOMO, I’m over here all blasé to the fact I get to participate in this iconic race. Seriously, Lindsay – what gives?!

This face sums up my typical pre-marathon mood.Yes, this is what I want.

Regardless of why I’m so off on this one, I think once I get to the city, attend the expo, pick up my packet and all those goodies, it will start to sink in and the joy, excitement, and nerves will follow – I hope anyway! The pre-race anticipation is one of my favorite parts of marathon training, and I want those butterflies and excitement. It’s funny, I used to wonder if there would come a time that I wouldn’t get so neurotic and edgy before a marathon. Now that time appears to have arrived and I’m not happy about this change of mood. Still, change can be good so perhaps I’ll get into the marathon spirit and have a great race!

Shoutout to all running Chicago Marathon Sunday. Those of you I follow on social media, I’ll be watching for your pics and moments throughout the weekend. Use hashtag #wellirl so I can easily find and retweet you.

Have you ever had an off reaction to an upcoming race? Were you uncharacteristically cool and aloof like me – or the opposite, and ball of nerves instead of your usual, cool self? Comment or tweet me @LindsayIRL.


Get the latest posts delivered to your mailbox: